Cork Woman Abused by Uncle Urges Families To End The Silence

A Cork woman was abused as a child. A family member assaulted her, and she wants families to end the silence surrounding abuse. Abuse within families often carries a heavy stigma. Olivia McCarthy was abused for years by Michael O’Riordan, who married into her family and was a close friend of her parents.

Olivia was around five years old when the abuse began. She initially thought nothing was wrong and suffered silently for years. Now, she advocates for parents to talk to their children, covering topics such as consent, which can protect them from abuse.

Olivia spoke with Cork’s 96FM Opinion Line to shine a light on her story so it could save other children from abuse. As a child, she felt scared because he often visited her house and was her mom and dad’s best friend.

He had total control over her. She was too young to understand what was happening, and she thought adults always acted this way. Olivia now wants parents to have ongoing conversations, which don’t need to be long, but must happen consistently.

Kids must know about their private areas and that no one should touch them there. Parents should repeat this message often so kids hear it repeatedly and before their teen years. Then, introduce the idea of consent and body autonomy.

Teens need to know about body autonomy: No one can touch them without consent, and they cannot touch others without consent. Olivia was five or six when it began. Michael O’Riordan kissed her improperly, and this happened in front of family.

She felt unsafe because of him. She constantly checked her surroundings and could not feel safe at home. Her parents tried to keep her safe. As a child, she didn’t know monsters existed, and understanding as a child is not easy.

Olivia wants people to know what happened. She states that abuse happens in families. She is not focusing only on her family. Her barrister said it’s common, and she had a similar reaction.

Olivia told somebody when she was nearly an adult. She said it took her too long to speak up and that she had battled with this for years. She first spoke of it at age seventeen. She didn’t forget it, and she remained deeply scared.

The trauma has affected her adult relationships, and she does not want to have children. She fears it will happen to them and that she would not recover. She said parents face horrible pain. It was not their fault, yet, they live with it.

She wants people to examine their families. Abuse gets hidden in many families. This is an old Irish tradition, she says. She has come to terms with losing her family but cannot let other families stay silent, adding that silence kills the victim, and ignoring the victim makes it worse.

Last month, Michael O’Riordan went to jail. He got three years for the assault. He abused Olivia McCarthy as a child in an incident that happened 30 years ago.

Olivia wants others to go to the police and urges any abuse survivors to report. She offers support for all.